Reach out to your friends during times of grief to let them know that your thoughts are with them.
Any time a person loses someone close to them, it is a devastating event. When that loss is a member of the immediate family, the devastation is intensified.
Comforting gifts and beautifully packaged sympathy gifts are an excellent way to convey your condolences and respect.
Send comfort gifts, gift baskets, care packages and presents packed with gourmet foods, fresh fruits, coffee, tea, flowers and booklets of encouragement and inspiration.
It is typically difficult to watch someone you love going through a painful experience. It is hard to find the right words to say or the right thing to do. Quite often, it is easier not to say or do anything to avoid the uncertainty and fear of doing the wrong thing. Unfortunately, this type of behavior isn't going to help much. Instead, why not learn how to act and what to say to make someone feel better when they are going through a difficult time.
Whether your friend or relative is going through a divorce, battling cancer, or experiencing the death of a loved one, it is important to do or say something so that you can make a positive difference in the way that this person feels. After all, if you donĚt do or say anything at all, how is your friend or relative going to know that you care?
Despite how difficult this might be for you, express your concern, sympathy, or support for this individual so that she knows that you are there if she needs you. You do not have to make a speech or go into a lengthy discussion. Instead, make a simple statement that mentions your care and concern for the individual or offer your help in a short, heartfelt sentence. The tone of your voice is more important than the words at this point. Speak in a soft, gentle manner in a soothing tone of voice.
Later, after time has passed, you should make another attempt to offer your help and support. This second offer reinforces the sincerity of your concern. Remember that even small comments allow the other person to know that someone is thinking about them, a fact that offers some solace.
Another way that you can express your concern or sympathy is to send occasional emails or notes in the mail. This way, you are keeping the line of communication open without being overbearing or annoying. This type of repeat communication tells the individual who is going through a difficult time that you genuinely care.
Listen, Listen, Listen
Once you offer your sympathy or condolences, listen to the other person. Allow him to express his pain without interrupting him. Additionally, as you listen, avoid the urge to say that you understand how he is feeling. While you might have gone through similar circumstances, you do not know exactly how he is feeling. You might have an idea, but you are not going to know exactly how he is feeling.
You should also remember that sometimes listening to the other person includes listening to his silence. If he needs to just be near him without talking, this is what you should do. Sometimes, silence is just as important as having a conversation.
Knowing just the right phrases to say and how to say them can be difficult for anyone in a trying situation. Always speak in a personal tone of voice. Avoid negative words or negative comments. Try not to use the word but when speaking since it negates the part of the sentence that goes with it. You should use the word and instead to express your concern in a more positive way. Instead of saying something such as ĎI know it hurts now, but you will feel better later, say I know it hurts now, and I know that you will discover the strength to get through it. Although it is a difficult time for your friend, you should focus on comforting words that make mention of pleasant times or circumstances.